I dye my hair red. It's actually brown. Or, going by my roots, mostly gray.
I am not Irish. Family lore has it that some of us got chased out of Ireland ages ago and ended up in Scotland, but Scots is what my mom's side owns and celebrates. (My dad's side is French-Canadian.)
I will most likely be drinking margaritas tonight. Which are faintly green, true. I'll be avoiding bars with shamrock decor however.
But, hey, Happy St. Patrick's Day.