Sad Day Pick-Me-Up: Small Actions to Support Your Child With Autism

I am having a sad day. Are you having a sad day? I am having a sad day.

I suspect it has something to do with social ineptitude, lack of sleep, and Iz's sporadic rotten pre-teen attitude which for some reason she unleashes on her dad -- especially uncool because Seymour is the kindest person I know. Anyone messing with my partner = instant rage for me. But the object of my ire is our daughter. So I can't lash and slash and destroy, I have to teach and listen and make her hear and understand.

Some sad days I just don't think I'm up for parenting these spirited girls, am so grateful that I can turn to Leo for comfort, revel in his absolutely accepting and sweet nature. For now. Puberty's gonna get him, too, I know. I've heard. I don't want to think about it yet.

I'm also mulling over Leo's annual IEP, which was yesterday. I can't write much about it yet -- I'm still processing the discussion, and we didn't finish anyhow -- we need a second, wrap up, hammer-all-the-pegs-in-place meeting. But Leo has made great progress, mastering or partially mastering many of his goals, the classroom continues to be dynamic place where the teacher and aides modify their approaches, schedule, and environment to meet his needs (frequently due to guidance from Supervisor M), plus everyone who attended the meeting is on Leo's side -- no other agenda, no costs, no reduction in services was raised. Which is something amidst a budget crisis.

So my sadness is amplified due to being in limbo with Leo's plans for the upcoming year. I loathe limbo. I like checking off boxes, boom, done, move on.

Since I can't flip a switch and fix Iz's attitude and Leo's future, I spent some time taking action on a quick project to support Leo: I typed up the social phrases we constantly practice with him and the sight words he's working on at school and with his wonderful speech therapist Sage, framed them for tidiness (Seymour likes tidy, is disinclined to let me tape lists to the walls), and installed them by the front door.

Now whenever anyone comes over and wants to interact with Leo, they have a checklist: Here are things you can say to him, here are words you can write down in any context and ask him to identify. I used a slip-backed 8 x 11 inch frame so we can change the list whenever we need to. So I've done one good thing today.

What quick fixes help your sinking moods, oh parents of children with challenges?

Here's the list, in case you were thinking of visiting:

QUESTIONS TO ASK LEO:

• What is your name?
• How old are you?
• When is your birthday?
• What is your address?
• What is your dad’s name?
• What is your mom’s name?
• What is your BIG sister’s name?
• What is your LITTLE sister’s name?
• How are you?
• Where do you go to school?
• What is your teacher’s name?

SIGHT WORDS TO PRACTICE
in order of mastery

• Leo
• Rosa
• go
• car
• snack
• straw
• red
• green
• blue
• yellow