"Take off your cape and just be a friend."

Please read Don't Be a Hero. It's an important essay on why folks who work or volunteer with people with disabilities need to rethink that pervasive Hero mindset. Excerpt:
 "Imagine learning that someone befriended you with intentions of putting it on their résumé as volunteer experience or merely to pat themselves on the back. What if your friend accepted your social invitations “out of the goodness of their heart?” How would it feel to know that what your “friend” gained from your relationship is the righteous feeling that they were doing you a favor? Would you feel like you were experiencing an authentic interpersonal relationship? I’d imagine not. I’d imagine you’d feel used, cheap and deceived."
I'd rather see folks with Iz's attitude. She went to a sibling camp with Leo a few years ago, and keeps asking when the next one is going to be. I told her she was getting old enough that she might be able to work at the camp soon.

She was excited, and said, "That would be great!"

"Yeah," I said, "The pay is pretty good, too."

Her response: "I'd get paid?"

More of that. Yes please.


  1. Yes! Like my son because he's funny, smart, knows EVERYTHING about movies and animation, and he's a great person. Don't bother if you just want to feel good about yourself. When my son was 9, in conversation a mom said how proud she was of her son. I agreed he was a great kid...and then she told me why she was proud: because her son was one of the only boys in the class who was a "friend" to my son. Ugh...the boy was genuine, but his mother's comment tells you all you need to know about her.

  2. Anonymous2:23 PM

    Your daughter is awesome!

    - Beth


Respectful disagreement encouraged.