6.20.2006

Mali, Cheerful and Awake at 12:30 AM

Ten rounds of nursing did nothing. She then said she was hungry, but food and then more nursing did nothing to help her drift off. I have turned her over to Maissy Mouse. She has redeemed herself somewhat by demanding bubbles, and then getting really excited and exclaiming, "I see bubbles!" Plus I now have a few minutes to blog away.

Having a wakeful baby at this hour is not entirely a surprise. Mali has been sick with awful chesty coughing for three days, which makes sleep difficult and easily interrupted. Also it's Summer! and that fucks up everyone's sleeping schedules if we're not careful (note to selves yet again: If Leelo sleeps in until 7:30 AM, then Leelo stays up until 10:00 PM. Waking him at 6:30 is mandatory. Either that or a long sunny afternoon pool session. Perhaps I will give pool owners Anya and Carys a distress call).

I don't think Leelo's current sleep cycle has anything to do with his meds. He has always gone through cycles of not wanting to go to bed, and has never needed as much sleep as his sister Iz, the decoy child who suckered us into having another child because why not, they sleep so much! I applaud Badger's choice to cut off all communication with those whiny yet persuasive ovaries.

Seymour and I have both been wondering about Adderupp's other effects on Leelo, because we seem to be seeing a lot of the best effects (calmness, focus, snuggliness, language) later on in the afternoon rather than what I think is the drug's active time. Because I do not actually know how long the drug is active in Leelo's system I have emailed a query to Dr. S.

The language we have been seeing has been funny, though not as remarkable as the first two weeks of the Adderupp trial:

Listening to song about various trucks, one of which makes a siren sound:
"Going to the hospital!" (How would he even know this? Observation? Richard Sc@rry?)

Viewing my bedhead in the morning:
"Clean up your hair, Mommy!"

Also it is now difficult to get him to wash his hands, as he gets distracted with goofy face making in the mirror or faucet.

He is more tolerant of people eating in front of him and has been keeping his shoes on most of the time. Both of these are upswings of familiar behavior cycles and cannot be attributed to medication. What was surprising was his calm if somewhat spaced-out sitting through an entire late fathers day dinner with our family plus Jo's SpangleFamily (Let it be recorded here that Manny can hang out with my kids any time. He is unbelievably sweet to Leelo and Mali, and even spent a good long time feeding our baby the soup she so craves).

Manny also doesn't put up with Iz's crap. Izzy was a pain in the arse through that dinner; I am hoping she shaped up enough to be a pleasant guest for the sleepover Jo generously offered.

The fathers day dinner actually took place on Saturday night, so Iz wasn't around for Seymour's traditional breakfast in bed. This was another bonk on my part; I was so excited that someone offered to take our resident grump away that I forgot about fathers day obligations for the second time. The first was my scheduling a trip with me, Iz, Violet, and Violet's sister Fifi to the mind-blowing SF Ethnic Dance Festival smack dab in the middle of Sunday.

The festival was a fantastic reminder of how great and glorious life can be when it is expressed through dance, percussion, and song; even though I would have preferred to have Seymour and Godmother Stacy with me, and even though I had to rearrange our seats four times so as to not kill the children whose lives had been placed in my hands.

I felt less guilty about Seymour's absence since he had a wonderful time mountain biking with a buddy for most of Saturday. I still blew it times two, though. He deserves better.

The rate at which I have been clocking such fuckups has made me wonder about adult ADD. I have always felt like a rudderless moron, and reading about ADD and taking quizzes (I scored very, very high) supports my suspicions. However a lot of the traits cited are manageable for me. I would like to be more focused and get more done, but I truly think that it is unrealistic for me to compare myself with ass-kickers like Armada and my oldest brother Chet. And Badger who lives life with enough intensity for three bodies. Nothing is wrong with me; rather I have unrealistic expectations because I don't hang out with anyone who isn't amazing. To achieve my goals I need not medication but a personality transplant.

I got knocked into this line of contemplation after a person close to me confided that she was taking Adderupp for ADD and that it has transformed her life, and then Chet related his recent sleep apnea diagnosis--he has been sleep deprived for about 25 years. He now has a machine to keep him breathing all night long, and is also the new owner of a transformed life. He told my mom that if he hadn't missed all that sleep, he'd be president by now. Instead he'll have to content himself with his shadowy role in Rummy's club, and achieving his third masters' degree while working full time as well as in the Reservz, and being a remarkable parent.

----Mali finally flipped out and then went to sleep. Finishing the next afternoon.-----

I worry about Iz, too. I wasn't even thinking about her until I noticed that every single one of the DSM IV criteria for inattentiveness hits her square on the head. I don't think that she needs medication or even professional intervention, but Seymour and I do need to help her figure out how to organize and keep track of her life. She has the potential to be one of the ass-kickers; I don't want her to end up warming the bench like her mom just because ADD has infiltrated our family tree (my officially diagnosed pilot brother, Dad, and several cousins are classic).

Not to write that Iz doesn't kick ass anyhow. She had a 60-second addendum to almost every comment made during The Tek's projection globe tour of the solar system (they can show any compatible data animation in spherical form, and as a former producer of 3D Atlas software I assert that it is one of the most beautiful experiences I've had in years).

Example:
Guide: Jupiter is made of gas, so you couldn't actually step on its surface like you can on The Earth or Mars.

Iz: You also couldn't step on it because Jupiter is so huge that its gravity would have already killed you!
Even though I was slightly embarrassed by Iz's commandeering of the presentation, her display of confident intelligence defused my still-lingering doubts about the appropriateness of Big Noggin for her younger-than-peers self.

Leelo liked The Tek, too. Mostly he grooved all the big rocks and bouncy things, but he also got a real kick out of the rollercoaster and bobsled simulators. He rode the rollercoaster ride that Iz created twelve times in a row, by demand. More cooperative play!

Mali was not quite in The Tek's zone, but she had fun running around anyhow. Especially when Iz and Quintana were chasing after a light display that intentionally skitters all over the gallery floor. Mali figured out the game in about two seconds, and joined right in the chase. Amazing to watch. Leelo stood on a rock nearby, oblivious even when I pointed out the light and the game.

But that's okay, that kind of game doesn't speak to him. He likes predictability and routine, like going to his weekly speech therapy session at Sage's house. Today he had one of the best speech sessions he's ever had. Sage said he was an entirely different boy. He needed neither food reinforcers (bribes) nor his beloved aquarium tubing chewie the entire time. He went potty without a fuss, and stayed completely dry. He said, "I want a break, Sage" spontaneously and with neither verbal nor visual (token board) cues. There was minimal fussing and no hitting; instead lots of snuggling and hugs. This session took place about 4.5 hours after Leelo took his daily Adderupp dose, hmm yet again. Sage mentioned that this may mean his dose is too high.

I feel the same way about Sage as I do about JerseyGirl/CalPal (JG used to live across the street; she is also the veteran behavioral therapist who and gave Leelo gratis sessions until we got our own program running; she hooked us up with Supervisor Andil who then hooked us up with Supervisor M). How amazing to have remarkable people in Leelo's life, both socially and professionally.

Sage's generosity is quite limitless, from what I can tell. Not only does she provide amazing speech therapy for Leelo with only the most infrequent of bills, but she has invited Leelo (and us, by extension) into her social circle of families whose kids are all more special than your little neurotypicals. She has even invited mb and me to three of their "Hot Mamas" nights, all of which were rollicking good fun. I am feeling very honored just now.

And now I don't need to blog for a week. Which is good because on Saturday we're going to San Dieggy to visit my folks. We're also going to attempt a day trip to Mexico so that Iz can experience Spanish trumping English. If anyone has any day trip suggestions, please comment or write me.

Sage

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