Remember that Star Trek: TNG episode where the grieving omnipotent alien had, in one instant of anger, obliterated every single member of a hated species using his Q-like brain power? If I had his powers I would most assuredly do the same thing to ants.

I normally have a very high ant tolerance threshold--I used to live in Africa, for chrissakes. However, they have been on constant attack at my house ever since Mali was born and I have HAD IT. It doesn't matter how spic-and-span we keep the kitchen and bathrooms--they swarm these rooms hourly. We can't eat anything without frantic cleaning up beforehand, afterhand, during, and then several times after again. Such a lovely undercurrent to the already-stressful holidays. Really makes those big family dinners extra-special.

Of course, Scabby the cat did her part to keep things jubliant by pissing all over my parents' comforter and bed for the second time during their visit.

And as long as we're discussing things feline: My friend JM came by our place yesterday to try to photograph my parents and all six of their grandkids. I warned him that it would be like herding cats, and I delivered. Utter screaming chaos. We got some good solo shots of Mali, though, as well as some good ones of me with Chet and The Moron Twins. The images are on JM's site at www.jmfotografia.com/dArtagnan (small D, big A).

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